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People often ask me how I come up with ideas. I usually have no idea what I am going to do. I play with shapes and paint like a kid--soon finding the piece's destiny. Incredible things race through my mind and feelings while I develop something---I have something impressive evolving, then I ruin it and I am very sad, then I come up with something new that's better. All of this happens in a span of a few hours---a compression of an entire life's work. It's an amazing process: looking at it from all angles, placing it in all possible places under different lights. "But how do I make this click?" I become overly pensive, my head swells from thinking. I get a rush imagining it with different additions.

When I go to bed I can't stop thinking about a painting and craving to do the next one having a new concept swirling simultaneously. It's an obsession---when there's a click, I let it go and let it "set in" for a few days. After a few days, it looks different, like someone worked on it while I was away from it. There is magic to the whole thing, not to mention the relationship I have with each piece. I love each one in a different way--they are all happy to have been born, some are more soulful than others, at times I hate one after loving it so much for weeks---so I change it. I rush home from whatever I am doing so I can stare at my newest creation. I spend hours just looking. I feel powerful, complete and happy to be me in this process. When people like it, it fuels me and brings me to new levels of momentum---there must be an interaction with the receiver for the whole circle to be complete. I also have these overwhelming feelings of desire to share my creations with the world, I feel so abundant I want to give bundles of creativity away, not possess it alone. I feel so confident about my art---like about nothing else in life.

Posted
AuthorAlicia Mannix
CategoriesEssays